IMAGE REPLACEMENT THERAPY
It’s catchy don’t you think?
I’m in the midst of changing
All I can about me
Because there’s so much I can’t change
I’ve started with these three.
My moods they needed attention
As well as some minor ailments
Doc Randall had the solution
Popped me on hormone replacements
I looked like a derro or so I thought
So a hair-cut & some new gladrags
And even a colour change resort
Soon I won’t be advertising dags
Finally the faithful old Falcon
Just didn’t suit my new image
I had to be severe and abandon
My new Celica took the privelege
Those three under more control
The look it wasn’t complete
So I’m replacing the fat in rolls
With a slimline shape to beat
All this work is tiring me
But I’m sure it will be worth it
For too long I’ve just let it be
Now damn it - I am worth It!
Narrell
December 1996
Friday, October 18, 2002
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF ......
You remember the story about the lynching and the Almost Bros and the desperate plea for someone to save this agent's neck....... please see previous fax message. Well, a very gracious publican actually came to the rescue with an offer ..... I put the offer to the band and they deliberated for about five seconds and came back with 'Thanks but no thanks' and canned the whole week-end. So much for working on behalf of 'rock stars'.
My stay of execution at the hands of the band has turned to imminent assassination at the discretion of the publican and the Secretary Manager of the club....either separately or together!
However all is not lost. The Hollywood Band had already asked if there was a possibility of something in that direction for New Year's Eve, two members of this band are actually the Jus-Two duo. So how flexible can we all be? Alack and alas, the other members of the Hollywood Band have all taken on positions in other bands for that night.
Enter the 'Jedd Hobb Band' - in an aside conversation, they were informed of the agency position - "sounds great!" they said, "we'll do it - we'll even move some other jobs!" See, there are real bands out there, with real ideals. These are the bands who will long be remembered. They will always deliver the goods.
So the Jedd Hobb Band will be heading out west for the New Year's weekend with their new sax player and will make their mark in another area of New South Wales and the end result will be that everyone is happy, especially the venues, who will be getting quality entertainment.
Oh how I love a happy ending..........
You remember the story about the lynching and the Almost Bros and the desperate plea for someone to save this agent's neck....... please see previous fax message. Well, a very gracious publican actually came to the rescue with an offer ..... I put the offer to the band and they deliberated for about five seconds and came back with 'Thanks but no thanks' and canned the whole week-end. So much for working on behalf of 'rock stars'.
My stay of execution at the hands of the band has turned to imminent assassination at the discretion of the publican and the Secretary Manager of the club....either separately or together!
However all is not lost. The Hollywood Band had already asked if there was a possibility of something in that direction for New Year's Eve, two members of this band are actually the Jus-Two duo. So how flexible can we all be? Alack and alas, the other members of the Hollywood Band have all taken on positions in other bands for that night.
Enter the 'Jedd Hobb Band' - in an aside conversation, they were informed of the agency position - "sounds great!" they said, "we'll do it - we'll even move some other jobs!" See, there are real bands out there, with real ideals. These are the bands who will long be remembered. They will always deliver the goods.
So the Jedd Hobb Band will be heading out west for the New Year's weekend with their new sax player and will make their mark in another area of New South Wales and the end result will be that everyone is happy, especially the venues, who will be getting quality entertainment.
Oh how I love a happy ending..........
Thursday, October 17, 2002
THE YEAR OF THE RAT
According to Chinese Horoscope, 1996 is the year of THE RAT.
It is only 6th February and I could have told you without knowing about the Chinese stuff, that this year is indeed the year of THE RAT.
I have been ratted on more in the first 38 days of this year than in any other 38 day cycle in my entire life.
And I ain't gonna take it lyin' down.
If this is what it takes to survive in '96 then the world has a fight on its hands.
Let it be known from this day forth that Narrell Brown won't be pushed around.
Every obstacle I meet I will challenge, every bastard I meet I will deal with, every no I will turn into a yes and every asshole can go elsewhere.
I have been "nice" for 41 years, four months and 5 days and my niceness has just about reached its use-by date.
1996 is the year I have to make it or go under and I don't go under without a 'Helluvva' struggle.
Take me on and you take on the pent up frustrations of being Mr Nice Guy for too, too long.
Be warned - 1996 might be the year of THE RAT, but I have the Rat Sack and I intend to use it.
I will survive 1996 with or without help - I will even thrive in this lousy bloody climate!
so rack off RATS - we don't need ya!
According to Chinese Horoscope, 1996 is the year of THE RAT.
It is only 6th February and I could have told you without knowing about the Chinese stuff, that this year is indeed the year of THE RAT.
I have been ratted on more in the first 38 days of this year than in any other 38 day cycle in my entire life.
And I ain't gonna take it lyin' down.
If this is what it takes to survive in '96 then the world has a fight on its hands.
Let it be known from this day forth that Narrell Brown won't be pushed around.
Every obstacle I meet I will challenge, every bastard I meet I will deal with, every no I will turn into a yes and every asshole can go elsewhere.
I have been "nice" for 41 years, four months and 5 days and my niceness has just about reached its use-by date.
1996 is the year I have to make it or go under and I don't go under without a 'Helluvva' struggle.
Take me on and you take on the pent up frustrations of being Mr Nice Guy for too, too long.
Be warned - 1996 might be the year of THE RAT, but I have the Rat Sack and I intend to use it.
I will survive 1996 with or without help - I will even thrive in this lousy bloody climate!
so rack off RATS - we don't need ya!
WAR AND PEACE
There are many businesses which rely heavily on building personal relationships with their clients. Frankly in some instances the businesses cannot survive without these relationships.
This fact is none truer than in the entertainment industry. The whole industry is forged on trust and understanding at every level.
When members unite to form a band, they have several reasons for doing so: Basically the members all have the same musical point of view which brought them together in the first place. Secondly the members all have to get along well together - by forming the band they have committed themselves to spending a great deal of time together in the future. Thirdly, they need to have faith in each other - they will each have a task to perform within the band but if any member doesn't co-operate or pull his weight the band can't perform at optimum level and therefore cannot progress or move forward, and finally, all of the members have to have the same amount of drive or ambition - if they are going to invest time and money into the venture, they have to know where they are heading. To what level they are striving to attain and what sacrifices they are prepared to make to get there.
This same amount of commitment is required in duo situations as well.
Another relationship which is formed within the industry is that between Agent and performer/s (whether band, duo, solo or variety artist). The performer/s must trust that the Agent is working on their behalf and has their best interests at heart and the Agent must trust that the performer/s will honour that faith and deliver their best possible performance every time.
The artist/s is representing the Agency every time it performs at a venue booked by that Agent. An Agent cannot book an artist in whom he has no faith because he/she cannot run the risk of having someone let the Agency down by presenting the wrong image for that Agency.
Different Agents have very different criteria for their booking procedures. What criteria they adopt is their own decision and is not dictated by any hard and fast rules. It appears an obvious conclusion to selective criteria that Agencies either grow or flounder. An artist that selects an Agency because of past performance by that Agent might find that they don't fit into the personal selection criteria of that Agent regardless of their performance. Forging a strong personal relationship with an Agent is usually the best way of ensuring an on-going working relationship. Regardless the type of business one operates, one will usually look toward friends and acquaintances as a first point of contact when requiring goods or services. This is true in the entertainment world as well, when a band requires a new member for whatever reason, it will usually be a friend or acquaintance who is invited to join. When an Agent requires a performer, it will usually be a person that they know well and can rely on who gets the job.
An Agent is really only responsible for negotiating the agreement between a venue operator or "employer" and the performer:
The "Entertainment Industry Act 1989" describes an Agent as: a person who, for financial benefit carries out any one or more of the following entertainment industry activities on behalf of a performer:
(a) seeking or finding work opportunities for the performer;
(b) negotiating the terms of an agreement for, and the conditions of, a performance;
(c) finalising arrangements concerning the payment of the performer;
(d) negotiating arrangements relating to the attendance of the performer at a performance;
(e) administering the contract of the performer with an entertainment industry employer.
With this being said there are many Agents who genuinely care about the performers and also care a great deal about the employers that they deal with. To this end (and it is usually the very small Agencies that bother), the Agent should take care of even the smallest detail, should give the performer advice, guidance and assistance wherever possible, should help write (or arrange for writing of) biographies, organise photographs and posters, should promote the performer with whatever means are available and will be familiar with what performers actually do (i.e. see the band perform, hear the artist sing etc.) .
(Paraphrased from an item entitled 'Guardian Agents' in "Good Weekend" by Nikki Barrowclough) There is often a state of war and peace which so often distinguishes relationships between agents and performers.
The world of agents and their clients balances on love-hate emotions, artistic frenzies, and complicated scenarios ranging from the dramatic to the absurd. On one side there are the highly creative people consumed by insecurity and emotional turmoil. On the other hand there's the Agent dealing with the paperwork, fielding phone calls and embracing multiple-personalities in order to cope with the tensions of the client. Although it's not just the artists who suffer angst.
'Sometimes it's agonising trying to find outlets that don't exist for an incredible amount of creativity - for musicians, for instance, who are ahead of their time' or just a little alternative.
The phrase, "Call my agent", is highly attractive with the implication of power and success. It's also an assurance of sorts. 'Agents move obstacles in artists' lives, and let them get on with being creative'. But the phrase has hidden attractions too. It can imply threat, or an inability to cope, without the other party getting a whiff of the fear or loathing consuming the client.
At such times, 'Call my Agent' can also mean call my banker, my moneylender, my agony aunt, my bail arranger, my divorce counsellor, my shrink. Oh yes, the Agent is often a substitute for the analyst's couch, although some Agents might need an analyst's couch occasionally themselves.
Then there's the fiscal side of things. The cardinal rule is 'never lend money', in reality Agents are usually owed so much money that it is a wonder they ever survive. While they listen to musicians' hard luck stories they are usually trying desperately to find enough money to pay their enormous 'phone bills.
Agents have to be as creative and as lateral thinking as their clients. Clients often chop and change between Agents, leaving for a variety of reasons, even for being left off the Christmas card list. Although the friendships forged usually remain in tact.
A lot of people are critical of Agents and accuse them of being failed performers or of living off the fame of others. Most Agents hold their own in that argument as most are not performers at all but very good organisers and see themselves as making a developmental contribution to the art scene.
'It's psychologically more beneficial to be able to say, 'Deal with my Agent, you can't negotiate on your own. You're in a weak position. If someone says 'we'll give you $x for your performance, it is very hard to tell them that you believe you are worth $x+. An Agent can do it because the Agent's ego is not involved.'
In their own right, Agents are performers too, they have to be. They have to perform every time they deal with any problem an artist or employer throws at them.
There is often a power-play between Agent and client and a danger of dependency in the relationship - usually on the client's part, although it might just as easily work the other way around.
Some Agents need mothering themselves.
Entanglement in the personal problems of clients can become complicated. Many an Agent has had to deal with domestic problems of clients or the strange assortment of bodies sleeping on the living room floor.
About the proliferation of women Agents, Garry Who sums it up nicely - "It's ego versus passion. Men are very ego-orientated. I'm not saying there aren't male Agents who don't have passion. But Agents with passion can't be bought. If an Agent actually cares, has a business brain and actually has a passion for what she is doing, you have to have complete and utter trust in them. When you trust male Agents it's not the same, because it's about their ego, and not about you."
There's a popular theory that women become Agents because they are more sensitive, and are better at nurturing and at playing mother confessor. Women are much more tolerant.
With chaos often preceding success it is the Agent who can think quickly on their feet when the pressure is on that will move mountains. Most Agents will defend their clients to the death and they usually get very wrapped up in the clients' careers. If the client succeeds so does the Agent so it is a small price to pay for an Agent to go the 'extra mile'.
There are many businesses which rely heavily on building personal relationships with their clients. Frankly in some instances the businesses cannot survive without these relationships.
This fact is none truer than in the entertainment industry. The whole industry is forged on trust and understanding at every level.
When members unite to form a band, they have several reasons for doing so: Basically the members all have the same musical point of view which brought them together in the first place. Secondly the members all have to get along well together - by forming the band they have committed themselves to spending a great deal of time together in the future. Thirdly, they need to have faith in each other - they will each have a task to perform within the band but if any member doesn't co-operate or pull his weight the band can't perform at optimum level and therefore cannot progress or move forward, and finally, all of the members have to have the same amount of drive or ambition - if they are going to invest time and money into the venture, they have to know where they are heading. To what level they are striving to attain and what sacrifices they are prepared to make to get there.
This same amount of commitment is required in duo situations as well.
Another relationship which is formed within the industry is that between Agent and performer/s (whether band, duo, solo or variety artist). The performer/s must trust that the Agent is working on their behalf and has their best interests at heart and the Agent must trust that the performer/s will honour that faith and deliver their best possible performance every time.
The artist/s is representing the Agency every time it performs at a venue booked by that Agent. An Agent cannot book an artist in whom he has no faith because he/she cannot run the risk of having someone let the Agency down by presenting the wrong image for that Agency.
Different Agents have very different criteria for their booking procedures. What criteria they adopt is their own decision and is not dictated by any hard and fast rules. It appears an obvious conclusion to selective criteria that Agencies either grow or flounder. An artist that selects an Agency because of past performance by that Agent might find that they don't fit into the personal selection criteria of that Agent regardless of their performance. Forging a strong personal relationship with an Agent is usually the best way of ensuring an on-going working relationship. Regardless the type of business one operates, one will usually look toward friends and acquaintances as a first point of contact when requiring goods or services. This is true in the entertainment world as well, when a band requires a new member for whatever reason, it will usually be a friend or acquaintance who is invited to join. When an Agent requires a performer, it will usually be a person that they know well and can rely on who gets the job.
An Agent is really only responsible for negotiating the agreement between a venue operator or "employer" and the performer:
The "Entertainment Industry Act 1989" describes an Agent as: a person who, for financial benefit carries out any one or more of the following entertainment industry activities on behalf of a performer:
(a) seeking or finding work opportunities for the performer;
(b) negotiating the terms of an agreement for, and the conditions of, a performance;
(c) finalising arrangements concerning the payment of the performer;
(d) negotiating arrangements relating to the attendance of the performer at a performance;
(e) administering the contract of the performer with an entertainment industry employer.
With this being said there are many Agents who genuinely care about the performers and also care a great deal about the employers that they deal with. To this end (and it is usually the very small Agencies that bother), the Agent should take care of even the smallest detail, should give the performer advice, guidance and assistance wherever possible, should help write (or arrange for writing of) biographies, organise photographs and posters, should promote the performer with whatever means are available and will be familiar with what performers actually do (i.e. see the band perform, hear the artist sing etc.) .
(Paraphrased from an item entitled 'Guardian Agents' in "Good Weekend" by Nikki Barrowclough) There is often a state of war and peace which so often distinguishes relationships between agents and performers.
The world of agents and their clients balances on love-hate emotions, artistic frenzies, and complicated scenarios ranging from the dramatic to the absurd. On one side there are the highly creative people consumed by insecurity and emotional turmoil. On the other hand there's the Agent dealing with the paperwork, fielding phone calls and embracing multiple-personalities in order to cope with the tensions of the client. Although it's not just the artists who suffer angst.
'Sometimes it's agonising trying to find outlets that don't exist for an incredible amount of creativity - for musicians, for instance, who are ahead of their time' or just a little alternative.
The phrase, "Call my agent", is highly attractive with the implication of power and success. It's also an assurance of sorts. 'Agents move obstacles in artists' lives, and let them get on with being creative'. But the phrase has hidden attractions too. It can imply threat, or an inability to cope, without the other party getting a whiff of the fear or loathing consuming the client.
At such times, 'Call my Agent' can also mean call my banker, my moneylender, my agony aunt, my bail arranger, my divorce counsellor, my shrink. Oh yes, the Agent is often a substitute for the analyst's couch, although some Agents might need an analyst's couch occasionally themselves.
Then there's the fiscal side of things. The cardinal rule is 'never lend money', in reality Agents are usually owed so much money that it is a wonder they ever survive. While they listen to musicians' hard luck stories they are usually trying desperately to find enough money to pay their enormous 'phone bills.
Agents have to be as creative and as lateral thinking as their clients. Clients often chop and change between Agents, leaving for a variety of reasons, even for being left off the Christmas card list. Although the friendships forged usually remain in tact.
A lot of people are critical of Agents and accuse them of being failed performers or of living off the fame of others. Most Agents hold their own in that argument as most are not performers at all but very good organisers and see themselves as making a developmental contribution to the art scene.
'It's psychologically more beneficial to be able to say, 'Deal with my Agent, you can't negotiate on your own. You're in a weak position. If someone says 'we'll give you $x for your performance, it is very hard to tell them that you believe you are worth $x+. An Agent can do it because the Agent's ego is not involved.'
In their own right, Agents are performers too, they have to be. They have to perform every time they deal with any problem an artist or employer throws at them.
There is often a power-play between Agent and client and a danger of dependency in the relationship - usually on the client's part, although it might just as easily work the other way around.
Some Agents need mothering themselves.
Entanglement in the personal problems of clients can become complicated. Many an Agent has had to deal with domestic problems of clients or the strange assortment of bodies sleeping on the living room floor.
About the proliferation of women Agents, Garry Who sums it up nicely - "It's ego versus passion. Men are very ego-orientated. I'm not saying there aren't male Agents who don't have passion. But Agents with passion can't be bought. If an Agent actually cares, has a business brain and actually has a passion for what she is doing, you have to have complete and utter trust in them. When you trust male Agents it's not the same, because it's about their ego, and not about you."
There's a popular theory that women become Agents because they are more sensitive, and are better at nurturing and at playing mother confessor. Women are much more tolerant.
With chaos often preceding success it is the Agent who can think quickly on their feet when the pressure is on that will move mountains. Most Agents will defend their clients to the death and they usually get very wrapped up in the clients' careers. If the client succeeds so does the Agent so it is a small price to pay for an Agent to go the 'extra mile'.
The Land of SOHO
I remember so many occasions when I said that I wouldn't be a party to some new technological advancement.
I never wanted any of those 'make life easier' gadgets that now clutter my kitchen cupboards. Nor were my children going to sit in front of the television set for hours on end, in fact I even tried not to own a set. That must have been centuries ago, obviously well before my children had their say. I don't even get a chance to speak to them now unless they are really not interested in the advertisement before them. I have since mastered the art of two-minute-fifty-nine-second conversation pieces. When all of our friends owned video recorders, we only video-sat them while they went on holidays (that was in the days when videos seemed to grow legs and walk out of lounge rooms - only to appear as cheap merchandise at the local pub the following week). I outlasted most of peers with not owning a video though...a fact I will always be proud of.
Then came the advent of home computers - "not for me" I vowed, "I'm a pen and paper girl!".
But, as fate would have it, I entered a field which required the use of a computer. A five-second crash course and away I went, expertly pointing and dragging, trashing and saving and creating masterpieces on my new 'toy'.
I made a career move and all of a sudden a proliferation of electronic wizardry surrounds me. I never cease to wonder where on earth it all came from. Surely I, the one who wouldn't have a kitchen whiz, could not have actually, consciously purchased this menagerie of wires, lights and buttons?
I believe I am, in the jargon of the nineties, a denizen of Soho - where Soho equals small office and home office. Here in Soho, it is actually possible to take a normal everyday lounge room and almost overnight transform it into a sophisticated communications centre almost rivalling that of NASA. I am, even as I write this, using what was once a figment of someone's imagination - my computer....and I even know what to do with it. When I finish this silly tale I will simply press 'print' and my nifty little 'Stylewriter' will provide me with a copy that I can take away from Soho. I might even send it to someone to read by popping it into the facsimile machine and dialling their number...even dialling is an obsolete term these days, everything is digitised and button pressed. If I pop up to the post office for a minute, I will simply turn on the answering machine to record any messages while I am out. Yes, that's life in the land of Soho! Here, I am SUPERGIRL...I can do anything.
Life really was simpler then, before the electronic invasion I mean. These days my big problem seems to be which model mobile phone to get, or what paging system would best suit, I really need a pocketbook computer, because my 'darling Classic' is a little large to pop into my handbag, oh, and that other dilemma I've had for a while - which photocopier to buy - or maybe I should rent one - and if I did - where would I put it.......oh, how I long for the good old days when all I had was paper, pens, a calculator, a telephone and a typewriter - I even thought in those days I could do anything....my how times change!
I am a music lover! Statement of fact! I love the look of black vinyl and record covers with brilliant artwork. I have treasures amongst my collection and I do treasure my collection. I was absolutely never, under any circumstances, going to convert to CD (compact disc format). Now as I look at my collection of over 100 CDs, I wonder what happened to my principles.
Where did I go wrong? The electricity bills are appearing much more frequently than ever before with much higher 'amount due's than ever before.....I guess it's the price you have to pay, living in the land of Soho.
For now, I will put this subject to sleep, I will 'print' then 'quit' on my PC, fax a copy off to the boss, click on the answering machine, turn off the forty-thousand lights which are still blazing at 4.30 am and then fall into bed to ponder the problem of where the damned photocopier will go!
I remember so many occasions when I said that I wouldn't be a party to some new technological advancement.
I never wanted any of those 'make life easier' gadgets that now clutter my kitchen cupboards. Nor were my children going to sit in front of the television set for hours on end, in fact I even tried not to own a set. That must have been centuries ago, obviously well before my children had their say. I don't even get a chance to speak to them now unless they are really not interested in the advertisement before them. I have since mastered the art of two-minute-fifty-nine-second conversation pieces. When all of our friends owned video recorders, we only video-sat them while they went on holidays (that was in the days when videos seemed to grow legs and walk out of lounge rooms - only to appear as cheap merchandise at the local pub the following week). I outlasted most of peers with not owning a video though...a fact I will always be proud of.
Then came the advent of home computers - "not for me" I vowed, "I'm a pen and paper girl!".
But, as fate would have it, I entered a field which required the use of a computer. A five-second crash course and away I went, expertly pointing and dragging, trashing and saving and creating masterpieces on my new 'toy'.
I made a career move and all of a sudden a proliferation of electronic wizardry surrounds me. I never cease to wonder where on earth it all came from. Surely I, the one who wouldn't have a kitchen whiz, could not have actually, consciously purchased this menagerie of wires, lights and buttons?
I believe I am, in the jargon of the nineties, a denizen of Soho - where Soho equals small office and home office. Here in Soho, it is actually possible to take a normal everyday lounge room and almost overnight transform it into a sophisticated communications centre almost rivalling that of NASA. I am, even as I write this, using what was once a figment of someone's imagination - my computer....and I even know what to do with it. When I finish this silly tale I will simply press 'print' and my nifty little 'Stylewriter' will provide me with a copy that I can take away from Soho. I might even send it to someone to read by popping it into the facsimile machine and dialling their number...even dialling is an obsolete term these days, everything is digitised and button pressed. If I pop up to the post office for a minute, I will simply turn on the answering machine to record any messages while I am out. Yes, that's life in the land of Soho! Here, I am SUPERGIRL...I can do anything.
Life really was simpler then, before the electronic invasion I mean. These days my big problem seems to be which model mobile phone to get, or what paging system would best suit, I really need a pocketbook computer, because my 'darling Classic' is a little large to pop into my handbag, oh, and that other dilemma I've had for a while - which photocopier to buy - or maybe I should rent one - and if I did - where would I put it.......oh, how I long for the good old days when all I had was paper, pens, a calculator, a telephone and a typewriter - I even thought in those days I could do anything....my how times change!
I am a music lover! Statement of fact! I love the look of black vinyl and record covers with brilliant artwork. I have treasures amongst my collection and I do treasure my collection. I was absolutely never, under any circumstances, going to convert to CD (compact disc format). Now as I look at my collection of over 100 CDs, I wonder what happened to my principles.
Where did I go wrong? The electricity bills are appearing much more frequently than ever before with much higher 'amount due's than ever before.....I guess it's the price you have to pay, living in the land of Soho.
For now, I will put this subject to sleep, I will 'print' then 'quit' on my PC, fax a copy off to the boss, click on the answering machine, turn off the forty-thousand lights which are still blazing at 4.30 am and then fall into bed to ponder the problem of where the damned photocopier will go!