It’s the eve of my fiftieth birthday ... I can’t sleep.
Thoughts are racing through my head.
I have had half a century to figure out who I am and what I want, I sat down to put those thoughts on paper but they don’t come to me now.
I’m that cute little granddaughter who was the apple of my nanna’s eye,
I’m that little girl who went to Sunday School at Lugarno Baptist church,
I’m that terrible neighbourhood kid who would never wear shoes,
I’m that chubby kid who was teased at school,
I’m that contrary student whose report cards always read “Narrell can do better”!
I’m that kid who never felt wanted because her sister was cuter and more outgoing,
I’m the angry teenager who tried to rebel but didn’t do it too well,
I’m the music fan who never quite figured out what music she really liked,
I’m the crazy girl who was always the life of the party, thinking that it was good for people to laugh at me,
I’m the mad cap Aunty who loves having the kids over so we can get up to silly antics,
I’m the overworked mum who never seemed to have enough time for her kids,
I’m the daughter who only ever wanted to hear her parents say ‘you’re okay’!
I’m the unsettled adult who made wrong choices,
I’m the crazy woman who thought she could take on the world and make a difference.
What do I want
I guess that keyring I bought many years ago says it all ...
“all I want is a little more than I will ever get”
I never wanted wealth or fame, but I feel like the richest person in the world when I look at my firends and famiy. I am proud of my children and my grandchildren. I have love from my husband, my parents, my kids and my friends in abundance!
Fame .. somehow I have managed to infiltrate the system and got my name around a fair bit ... in many circles and for different reasons, but I have certainly succeeded in making my mark.
Happiness ... I have it in bucketloads, and it is the people who surround me who make it so.
Health ... despite years of neglect even my health has not let me down too much. What more can be said.
Where Am I going
Absolutely nowhere .. why would I change a single thing in my life.
I’m fifty years old and as happy as can be.
I love my life, my work, my firends, my family.
All I want is more of the same thank you very much.